Dealing with the loss of a parent
Our parents love us from the time we are born, until the very moment they pass on from this world, and when we became parents, we understood them like we never had before. They teach us everything, yet leave us wanting so much more. There for our ups and downs and never giving up in the face of adversity, losing a parent is one of the hardest experiences you’ll ever have because they are your support system for your entire life.
Think about it. Whenever you have faced grief in the past, your parent has always been the one there to provide you with emotional support and wisdom. When your grandparents pass, your Mum and Dad are usually around to offer guidance and emotional support. Who are you supposed to turn to when this support is gone?
While many people lose parents as adults, the instance of losing a parent can make you feel like a vulnerable child. Despite having a spouse or children of your own, the loss of your parent is not an easy experience to share with others. You may feel more comfortable bottling up your emotions, but this only leads to further pain and potential violence. Concealing your pain and shying away from contact will only make you more emotionally unstable, so it is important to be open with those you can trust about your true feelings at all times.
When losing a parent, it is a common myth that the pain will go away faster if you simply ignore it. While ignoring loss will give you temporary relief, this will prove to be a painful strategy in the long run. The only way to accept the loss of a mother or father is to face your circumstance and allow your grief to surface.
Try to remember the best qualities of your lost parent, and then apply those qualities in your own life. As parents, this time in your life will prove to be an opportunity to pass on the valuable lessons your parents once taught you. No matter how you choose to face your loss, do so in a way which honours your late parent(s) and aides you through the healing process. Only then will you find true acceptance.